Chased, Pursued...Then Dropped

It happens; someone is attracted to you and they make it known. They let you know they want you, other people know they want you, you get the calls, tweets, texts - everything. Then you go out with them and it's fun. It's exciting. They text you in the morning to see what you have going on for the day, and they text you at night to ask how it all went. There's constant offers to go out and do things; if they don't hear from you, they're wondering why; if they can't see you, they try to plan for another day.... and then you get into them. You start reciprocating the feelings; you have just as much anticipation as they had at the beginning. That lasts for a little while, but then it stops.

I hear this story a lot, from friends, on TV, I see it on blogs in celebrity relationships, and even from my own experiences. From the stories, I've noticed 1 of 2 things are usually going on:

• You give in because of the effort. All the calls, texts, money spent, and energy they are putting in must mean they really want it right? They like you so much (it seems), so you let them in. But you don't take time to actually assess what qualities they have and if YOU would have pursued THEM on your own. You're just responding to what is coming your way. If this sounds like what happens with you, then it's probably just the Attention you enjoy. Start looking at the people who are chasing you and make sure they are worth YOUR attention. It could prevent you from getting into these disappointing situations.

• The other thing that may be happening is - you have a lot of "window-shopping" appeal... you look good, clothes are nice, keep everything together, everything you're talking about at the beginning sounds good - but what's after the first part? People could be losing interest because you don't have much going on after that. Maybe you have to make sure you have some depth - something going on beyond that initial attraction. Are you interesting? Do you have anything going on? Are you thinking bigger than your surroundings, and staying in the same circles/cycles? A lot of times you have really pretty girls/great looking guys who are small-minded. People lose interest because there's nothing more.

This isn't to say that there are only 2 possibilities. Sometimes, it's just a jerk who is playing games. You show attention back, and they don't know how to handle it. They need a challenge, and when you're not a challenge anymore, they are over it. The jerks have something fucked up going on in their head, and that's for them to fix. The 2 scenarios I gave here are what I see most often, but I want to hear what you see.

What situations do you see? Has this happened to you or a friend? What's the usual explanation?

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